Diary from within Corporate America

It’s Friday and I am about to start my usual routine. Go downstairs to the little corner store to get some fruit. Even though I know the fruit selection is terrible on Friday. I still have all optimism that I will find something especially ripe for me.

To my surprise the corner store had a bunch of freshly ripe bananas. This is definitely a first. Isn’t it sad that the highlight of my day at work revolves around eating? In the mornings when I get to my desk I can’t wait to go back downstairs and grab a piece a fruit. Then after searching the internet and being denied from viewing “so called inappropriate sites”, I watch the clock until it’s twelve o’clock. And after twelve I sit and wait until it’s five.

Due to the recent economic downturn, life at work can be compared to a turtle crossing a four lane highway. Everyone is holding on by a thread and pretending that they have work to do. I for one have never been good at pretending but I have had to pick up this art to pay the bills. Every morning I dread coming to this place where I sit and stare at a computer all day. Where I make money for a large corporation who when the good times are gone sees me as a number or the recent terminology “head count”. I have not always felt this way about my job. Once upon a time I felt very important and had a lot of work to do. But a recent turn of events changed my entire perception of “Corporate America”. I have always been a self motivated, innovative person but there is something about bureaucracy, office politics and sitting at a cube all day that can change that.

When trying to attract young talent corporations use words such as: self motivator, leader, initiative, innovative and team player. I don’t know if this is some lame attempt of upper management to see how fast they can drain the life out of employees or are they truly serious. It continues to amaze me because with all the policies and procedures that a corporate employee has to follow, how can one be innovative if their ideas have to go up the hierarchy only to be rejected. Now I don’t want to sound bitter or discouraging but do they really want these qualities if they are going to conform you to the way they think things should be done? I think job descriptions should read: Conformist -know how to keep your mouth shut when someone in a higher position says something you don’t agree with, Brown Nosier- kiss the bosses ass as much as possible no matter what, Competitor- step on everyone’s neck to get to top, who needs friends when you are the CEO of the company you can pay people to be around you and most of all withhold as much information as possible you don’t want anyone getting the upper hand.

Disclaimer: If you follow these simple guidelines you are sure to make it to the top.